Parenting is not for the faint of heart. It can be downright hard at times. As a parent, it is possible to go through ALL the emotions in a single day. Even though our children can frustrate and anger us, we love them dearly and we don’t want them to experience anything negative. We only want happiness for our kids. However, if we aren’t careful, we can become the dreaded “helicopter parent,” micromanaging everything our child does, watching carefully to annihilate anything that could potentially cause them pain or discomfort.

As parents, we can totally be overprotective at times. It pains us to see our kids fall and/or get hurt. It can be heart-breaking to see the look of anguish on their faces with tears streaming down their cheeks, or the manifestation of intense fear and anger that may come as a result of feeling like they’re not in control of their circumstances. Seeing our children go through such pain and turmoil can be gut wrenching. So, we run to them, hoping to take away the pain, and desiring to keep them from all future trials and tribulations.

I’m not saying it’s a bad thing, to want to prevent every bad thing imaginable from happening to your child. Nobody, including Father God, wants to see their children hurting, but to completely remove every obstacle from their lives, will only cause them harm.

Most often, as parents, we tend to automatically place blame on whatever, or whomever, hurt our child. For example, if they stub their toe on the chair, then it’s automatically a bad chair. We’re inadvertently teaching them how to blame others for their misfortunes instead of taking responsibility for their own actions. Granted, there are times when others mistreat, or even abuse them, through no fault of their own. This is where forgiveness comes into play.

Our job as parents is to teach our children how to properly respond to situations. It’s easy at times to try and turn their focus on us, and onto how much we love them and can protect them, and we begin to believe we are their savior, and not Jesus Christ. God never gave us the job of rescuing them from every uncomfortable, or painful, situation they may encounter. If that was the case, it would behoove us to place all our children in a bubble and never allow them to leave the house, or our side. Our job is to trust God with our children. Our job is to come alongside them WHEN they get hurt (it’s inevitable), to comfort them, and to teach them how to respond in the Spirit of God. Our job is to teach them how to forgive and not hold grudges. Our job is to teach them how to go to God in prayer, and trust that He is their deliverer (Psalm 91), and the lifter of their heads (Psalm 3:3).

God allows things to happen in each one of our lives that are meant to grow us up and mature us. If we never went through anything, we would never see His salvation.

Sometimes we must go through things more than once in order to really learn, and understand what’s going on, and how to respond properly. It’s the same for kids. It may take them a while to fully make that connection between what’s happening and why. For example, it took a long time for my teenage daughter to realize that others do not like to text non-stop throughout the day because they have other things going on. She would take it personally and jump to the conclusion they didn’t like her if they didn’t respond within a certain period of time. We had many conversations that year, just spending time pouring into her what God says about her, refuting the lies of the enemy, and discussing how to respond in the way Jesus would respond.

Sometimes, children go through things that seem unfair, that never should have happened to them, etc. However, rest assured, God will turn all that evil around for their good. Those children will become stronger in areas than others who have not gone through the things they did. Their testimony can help reach down into another’s pit of despair, draw them out, and set them on higher ground.

Sometimes as parents, we can become prideful, thinking we can take better care of our children than God. We look at what God says about them, or their future, and if it doesn’t line up with how we see things, we get all flustered, and try to steer them in the way we want them to go. Oftentimes, we attempt to raise our children the way our own parents raised us, or we attempt to live the life we’ve always dreamed of through our children. We have our own ideals and ideas that we attempt to place on our children, and in all reality, they are not the same as God’s. We end up steering our children in the wrong direction. So many times, we put our focus on things this world values – degrees, money, titles, large homes, luxury vehicles, etc. but our focus needs to be upon the Lord and His will for our lives, and our children’s lives. Sometimes what is best for us, and our children, is not what is most pleasing or comfortable to us. It is imperative that we teach our children how to follow the Holy Spirit and go in the direction God wants them to go, versus the direction the world says to go. When we seek first the Kingdom of God, when we seek Him first, and His will and desire, then all that other stuff will be given to us as well (Matthew 6:33). Let us look through the lens of Heaven, and not through the lens of this world.

Our children are on loan to us; they belong to God. How prideful to think we could raise our children better than God. How prideful to think we know better than He concerning their future. How prideful to think we could do a better job that He, protecting them from harm. God is fully capable of keeping, and preserving, our children. I encourage you today, if you have been an overprotective, worried, fearful parent, and what I said has hit something deep inside you, simply bring it before the Lord.

“God, I renounce operating in pride concerning the rearing of my child(ren). I am sorry for believing the lie that I could ever do a better job than you. I choose to trust you with the child(ren) you have given me, and I thank you for your ability to keep them on the right path. I may have to watch them go through painful periods, but I know, and trust, that you will work everything out for their good and that you will work out all your plans for my child(ren)’s lives, for you Lord are faithful (Psalm 138:8). In Jesus’s Name, Amen.”